Problems of Cyclists
June 3, 2023•454 words
When I go to sleep at night I think of all the events of that day on the road. The longer the ride the more events. Strangely I don't always remember where I've been and I need to actually think about it. Wait was that today or yesterday? The problems of someone who cycles a lot is the lack of ability to discern in one's mind between rides.
But I saw that dead dog...today...not yesterday. Wait, I saw one yesterday and one today. How many sheep did I see today? None today, but a hundred or so yesterday. Wait, why does it matter? Because they're cute and make me think of the Patriarch Abraham thousands of years ago or King David before he was a king and just a nobody shepherd.
That old guy selling strawberries, smiled and said "Hello" in Arabic, English or Hebrew? It must have been English because I remember it in English, but why would he be speaking to me in English? And I said "No thank you!" in what language? Wait that wasn't today because that was on route so and so and I was there two days ago...according to the gps details apparently! Still not sure what language was spoken.
But someone did try to sell me strawberries today...ah right...it was these kids on the climb by Ja'aba...and they spoke...Hebrew. Right, Hebrew and I said "Lo toda haverim!" "No thank you friends!" in Hebrew. Fancy that, friends, why do I call everyone friends? Do I call everyone friends? Indeed I do! Except for cops, I call them brothers. WTF? Why do I call cops brother? Ah because they call me that "Hey brother, where do you live?"
Right, and did anyone call me brother today? Nope, oh wait yes, "Hey brother, do you have ID?" at the checkpoint. Shit, that wasn't today.
And where do those trucks honk with that amusing beep-bap-beep honk? It happens a lot over at that place... Ah right, that's over there and it's only Palestinian trucks. Always cheers me up.
Beep bap beep as if the circus is passing me.
And I swear I saw a guy with a sub-machine guy today and he wished me "Have a safe weekend, brother". So I did descend that road after-all and crossed that checkpoint. Right, I remember they're always exceptionally friendly as if I'm at a hotel lobby, presenting an AMEX Centurion card...sort of.
"Welcome back...brother!" home safe...well...50 km from home.
Did I almost slip today? No but I overtook five cars. Why did I do that, because they were slow. You wish, it was a traffic jam. Ah right! Lockdown is over, traffic jams!
Now go the F#%& to sleep, tomorrow the road awaits.