Norwegian Wood Dystopia


I hate the city now. It's dark and gloomy. Not the weather, the people. All the fun and excitement that used to be here is gone. The shops even though open appear closed. The once attractive women are now fat and unkept. The strange people, no longer stand out.

The police cars parked randomly no longer make me feel safe like they used to. You see a cop talking to someone, you know they're in trouble for some minor violation of some fake law. Fake law, because it's not ratified, and it won't be ratified but nobody knows that, or cares to know that. So this once special city is now under fake law and order. The thing is if you don't keep those laws, the police won't bother you, because you're not actually breaking the law, but the people will look at you with disdain and hate you under their breath to the point where if you're a normal human being you'll fold. You'll keep the fake laws just to walk in peace.

I can't do that. I can't even pretend to care and I keep waiting for trouble but it never comes. I wait for the cops to call me out, but they don't. And the people, some of them look at me but they don't dare say a word. They don't even open and close their mouths in an attempt. I tell myself that maybe it's the way I look, maybe it's my energy, but then I see rare pretty women, walking with their heads high, shiny heels and dressed in a Parisian style not caring about the fake laws and nobody says anything to them either.

It seems as if the fake laws only work on confused and naturally frightened people. Sometimes I even see children who don't care about the fake laws and they look so small and vulnerable but nobody says anything to them either.

It's like a disease and some of us are immune or it's a new sanity and we're exempt as the sadly insane.

You'd think the police would be out in tanks and armored vehicles in this kind of reality but they're not. In fact they look vulnerable themselves. But the masses of fake law abiders will not engage, will not disobey, and will not argue with them. And the others, such as yours truly, never find themselves in a situation where they need to even interact with them.

Was it always like this? No, not when I was a teenager. I have so many great memories. Beautiful girls, fast food, live music, tourists, street musicians. With the exception of the tourists and apparently the beautiful girls, you'll still find the rest in the city but it's changed. The street musician doesn't comfort you. The fast food doesn't taste the same. And actually, live music, that one's been gone for a long time. And honestly, it's better that way as I can't even imagine what a disaster that would be. Sometimes it's best to live the memories.

I remember being in love, being in lust, getting turned on from watching beautiful tourist girls licking their ice cream. People watching was unusually exciting when I was 17. Watching a girl eat ice cream now is like watching a pig chomp down on vegetables. Everything sensual has disappeared. Everything romantic is gone. Sexuality is dead.

And kindness. I remember kindness. Beggars receiving money and food. Charities feeding people. Volunteer medics helping injured people. Police officers giving directions. All that once upon a normal stuff. Again it's still here but it's changed. Police officers will still give you directions but you won't feel grateful. The charities still do their work but their volunteers don't feel good about it. It's not that they're rude or indifferent, it's more like a spark that's gone. There used to be this fire in people. For some a low burning flame, for others a high burning flame but now there isn't even burning coal.

So if this is the case with the fake law abiders what's the case with the fake law exempt? Depression, endless depression. Not suicidal and not weighted down, but imagine living with the realization that all of this is fake and it could end in a moment if everyone would just realize it. But this is another lie, because it's been like this for so long that they probably can't snap out of it.

It's unheard of that a fake law abider rebels and joins our ranks, there's no rebellion. There's no fight. There's just them and us. We feel sorry for them and they think we're insane. It's not something that can be won or lost, it's beyond that.

And it's not some kind of police verses citizens situation because the police are just like them and the ones who are like us left the police long ago. And the government while corrupt as ever is also like them. There's not a single politician who is against the fake laws. Not a single judge, teacher or professor. All there is, is obedience.

For the sake of clarity let's call them Robots and let's call the others, like myself, Humanoids. Of course they would prefer to call themselves humans and us lunatics but that's besides the point.

A robot does everything that a normal humanoid does but he or she doesn't know why they do what they do. They cross the street when it's green because the law says so but if they would come up with a fake law saying that from now on you cross when it's red, they would start crossing when it's red without a thought, complaint or even a comment. While we would still only cross when it's green and not cross when it's red. And as you probably guessed it the police would not say anything to us about crossing when it's green but they would say something to robots crossing when it's green, but a robot would rarely cross when it's green if this were now a new fake law. Robots cannot be criminals, they cannot disobey. Even if the fake law changed within minutes before the robot became aware of the new law he or she would not be violating the law as there is a 24 hour period to allow for a fake law to come into effect. It's impossible for them to break the law. Of course from our humanoid perspective what they're keeping are not actual laws so it's completely irrelevant if they keep them or violate them.

A robot woman will never fall for a humanoid man and a humanoid man will never fall for a robot woman. There won't even be an attraction strong enough to warrant a one night stand or alleyway blowjob. In fact robot hookers will not sleep with a humanoid under any circumstance. It's not even a conscious choice. If you walked up to one with a suitcase of bills she wouldn't even say no or yes, she would say nothing. There would be no interaction. But when a robot man walks by you'll hear right away "50 for 15 minutes, normal and 80 for anal." followed by "You can scan my certificate". You can scan my certificate.

Certificates, when robots want to know something about each other they scan each other's certificates. I'm not certain what's mentioned in a certificate as I don't have one and there would be no need for me to scan one and even if I wanted to I don't have that piece of shit gadget that they do. But my guess is that it contains data. But when they buy coffee they also get their certificate scanned but they still pay for their coffee so I'm not sure what the deal is. And truthfully I don't really care.

It sounds selfish or small-minded but if you were here, with me, you'd want to get as far away from these robots are you could. Not because they're dangerous, or mean, but because they're depressing as hell.

Being around them is like walking in a grey cloud, not under one. All your energy gets sucked out and you start questioning everything and why you don't just end it all now. But as soon as you're away from them these thoughts cease. It's almost as if it's programmed but whoever programmed them that way didn't do so for them to affect us humanoids as they know that they can't. There's no attempt to convert us or bring us over to the other side so it's likely just a natural disturbance more than anything.

Back to coffee, when I buy a coffee it's from a robot coffee shop but they won't ask for my certificate and they won't greet me. Again not because they're rude but because I'm irrelevant? I'm not sure how to explain it but I will get my coffee just like everyone else but without the smile or my fucking certificate scanned as I don't have one. How can they tell that I don't have one? When a robot walks into a store they're scanned automatically and I'm pretty sure the robot behind the counter sees their details. I know they're being scanned because of that ridiculous beep every time one of them walks in. When we walk in there's no beep.


I see her sitting there alone. Her being alone is enough to tell me that she's one of us but being pretty and kept reinforces it even more.

"Can I join you?" I asked as we don't mingle with the others and the coffeeshop is packed.

"No, I'm waiting for someone else." she smiles.

I hesitate in my momentary confusion as she signals me to take a seat.

"Thank you" and I begin to dip my chocolate croissant into my latte.

Staring at me with a mix of curiosity and disgust I pretend to not notice.

"Is that a new thing?" she asks sincerely.

"It's a new law" I tell her and she laughs.

In her presence the typical depression of being around robots is less apparent. I look at her and see the darkness under her eyes, the character of the struggles we go through in this new world that surrounds us. She looks at me but I know she's looking at the darkness under my eyes as well. She half-smiles and returns to reading her book. When she catches me trying to figure out the title she holds it up for me.

"Norwegian Wood" Four purple plums would make more sense to me than Norwegian Wood in this city but I nod in acknowledgement and go back to dipping my croissant in my latte.

"Don't I know you from somewhere?" she asks, squinting.

"Oh here we go" can't a man just drink his coffee without being hit on?

"I'm sorry I'll leave you alone" somewhat sulking.

"No it's fine, but I look like that fucker on the billboard over there, so I get it a lot" I say pointing at that massive billboard with celeb wearing a doctor's outfit, holding one of his many gadgets.

"Oh nah, you don't look like Dr. Evil but you do look like a kid I knew when I was a girl and lived up north"

"Up north?" Now I'm intrigued as I was born and raised in the Northern Territories.


"I was born there and grew up there until the changes"

"It's you, isn't it?" certain of herself.

How well I knew her once. And I wonder if she remembers all the nonsense we did in the shadows and fields when we were too young for any of that. But I was pleased to know that she is well after all that happened there.

"Yup, just a bit older now" me not, her. She looked stunning and among robot women tenfold.

You'll only receive email when they publish something new.

More from Ami Says
All posts